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Guided meditation

Guided breathing meditation with
Mark Golding
(Mp3, 16:03)

SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 216

I'm not sure I want to talk about peace, love and happiness today, I'm thinking that self-loathing is the thought of the day...

Now, I'm not in the midst of that particular maelstrom right now, but I have just had one of those moments when I could recall, see and taste what it was like.

That imprisoning and crippling deformation of reality, that distorts and twists, obscures and confuses, ensuring that no exit exists, and no respite can be found, other than oblivion. And, when it was at its strongest for me, it was added to by a sense of guilt that I should be so concerned about myself. Adding to the mix, and, I was my own torturer...

Serious and heavy stuff.

That was then, but the memory is strong! Loud and clear! So, what happened, what started its retreat? Well, it started when I realised that when others spoke kind words to me, uttered gentle praise or offered compliments, these words had a power, a power that I did not have to shun for fear of being exploited, but a power to illuminate a pathway out of my prison.

I had to be gracious enough to accept what was coming my way, be they words of encouragement, respect or love, and this was terrifyingly difficult, as I could not trust. I thought that by opening up to love, compliments or kind words I would be weakened, vulnerable and exposed, and this would increase the possibility of being exploited.

I have not got it perfect just yet, as some have slipped in under my radar (and hurt or used me), but I can say that I have learned to trust first, and question later. This is better for me, and as a result of my mistakes I have developed an increased intuition as who I can trust. And, in the end it all becomes clear, as eventually true personality shows, and we can see who our real friends are.

As someone said to me recently 'a bad penny takes a long time to drop'!

Find solace with your trusted and loved ones, do not be afraid, as the beautiful ones, the light ones, have no agenda other than to help you to be free from your self loathing. xx

Tuesday, 18 November 2008

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Individual - Separate - Together - As One

A seemingly contradictory collection of words and concepts, but this is a common experience, a reality, a truth for us. I'm saying us, as over the weekend we spent some time letting go of ordinary appearances and conceptions and tried to see what actually lies behind 'reality'.

Individual. Well we both have our identities, history, hang-ups, problems, issues and families.

Separate. We are isolated from each other, in the physical sense, and sometimes in the emotional and spiritual sense.

Together. We are linked together, in relationships, friendships and families.

As One. Beneath the normal appearances and conceptions, and even aside from the subtle existence, lies a commonality, a thread, network or system that links everyone and everything together.

We can understand this partially, by realising that we are all comprised of the same substances, in the form of atomic structure, but also that in the subtle worlds that exist beneath the 'normal' world, the man made conceptions of linear space and time do not actually exist.

It was described as, and experienced by me in this way.

Access to the subtle, or etheric world enables communication without restrictions, rather like the internet. We can, from our computers, access any website at any time, and also communicate and interface with any one, any where at any time.

Distance is no object, and we can email 1000's of people in one mailing, and also the networking sites, such as facebook offer common notice boards for our notifications and public communications.

Once we have entered the subtle world, it is possible to communicate, subtly to any one, anywhere.

We discovered that we could share thoughts with each other, and wondered if we could also share thoughts with others, not in the same physical space as us. And, we can.

In this subtle world exists a safety, a love and a trust that allows the safe development of our wishes, dreams and capacities for growth and development, and more.

And we conceived a wish, a dream, we shaped and discussed it, and managed to, in the imaginary capacity to fully realise the dream. And, from dreams and wishes, reality can be born.

Our wish? That everyone, all over the world, with any faith, faith in their highest potential would glimpse that inner realisation, realise that it can happen, and that would trigger a desire to fulfill that very potential and their highest capacity for love, compassion, truth and healing would be ultimately realised.

And that in turn would inspire those without faith, by their direct observation of other's inner potential as manifested by actions, thoughts and deeds, to realise that they too had potential, causing faith in their own potential, though latent, dormant and obscured, and thus their faith and potentials be ignited and nourished to develop and grow.

And, this in turn facilitated, finally and ultimately, all beings to realise their highest states. Knowing that truth, love, safety, communication exists beneath the clutter and chatter of normal life, and that within our commonality of love and truth, we are, as one.

So, quite a wish. Quite a dream.

But though virtually impossible, it is actually possible. We are here, adding our bit to the wish, to the dream, in the knowledge that our dreams can come true.

Over the weekend there was an event whereby 4.3 million dominoes were lined up into a single linked system, and the world record was broken. If you look it up you will see it... It took many people many weeks to get everything ready, and in the right place, and I'm sure things went wrong, but it happened, and the record was broken. And, man, is it amazing to watch!

One last word from the weekend... 'Faith is the Flame in Your Heart'.

I am sooo happy to share this with you. xxx

Oh, if you wish to pass this around your family and friends, in a ripple effect, who knows what might happen. xxx 'Faith is the Flame in Your Heart'.

mark xxx

Monday, 17 November 2008

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The light that shines in the heart has a power that can outshine the sun.

The warmth and light that we can experience, by closing our eyes and reflecting our vision inwards, towards the heart centre, can enable us to transcend, even if only momentarily, every single worry, fear and concern.

A moment, a snatched glimpse of the peace, the light, the safety, the nourishment, the security we need, is there. Right now. And, it is us, we, who choose to release that connection, through familiarity, bad habits, laziness or foolishness. I can say this, as I know it from my own experience. My own laziness, my own foolishness.

I always thought I knew best, and this self-destructive and arrogant attitude, could have continued to blinker and separate me from my inner light. You see, and I know I am on a bit of a confessional here, but having a clear intelligence and intellect can actually serve to distract me, simply by reasoning positivity and peace out of the park.

In other words, I am too clever. More fool me.

But when its raining, I am going to shelter, I do wish to be closer to the light, dry and warm, and, the place of shelter, warmth and safety lies within. And at that time I shall leave my intellect by the door, along with my dripping raincoat, I shall step inside and experience... Stop thinking, and dry my toes by the fire.

I have such a clear image, of so many steaming stocking feet up, around a beautiful fire of warmth, love and peace, with laughter, happiness, sharing and loving, toasting forks, candlelight, where all my wishes can come true.

I can dream. I can wish. xxx

Friday, 14 November 2008

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So, as I journey into the future of my life, I learn. I learn as I am seeing that which I have never seen before, and these things that I am seeing, I am growing to understand, have meaning in my life.

In other words, I am growing aware that everything that happens to me, both happens for a reason, and moreover, that reason can be realised and understood.

Extrapolating this to its conclusion, I am wondering, if with sufficient awareness, that every breath of wind I see and feel, every subtle flavour I taste, all the multitude of sounds I hear, and every scent I sense... as well as every appearance to my mind, might be understood with regard to the meaning it conveys? I understand, that at this time, this appears to be an abstract or even an impossibility, but I am guessing that such awareness is possible.

And, if possible, what for? To what purpose?

Well, we were talking (like we do...), and asking ourselves this same question. And for us, we believe that every appearance we experience, carries the potential to teach, through the understanding that each appearance is a karmic impression, caused by our previous actions, and through understanding our past, in relation to the present, an exquisite refinement of our responses can be initiated, developing a fluidity of mind, a flexibility of response, that can be utilised and integrated into spiritual growth and development. In a nutshell, learning from the past.

Now I know this sounds a little, well, extreme, but I just thought I'd share a little of my aspirations with you..

Only dreaming now... xxx

Tuesday, 11 November 2008

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Last night we spent hours talking about truth, hours and hours. About why we should not be afraid of the Truth, why it was so difficult to speak the truth, and why we are ashamed of some aspects of the truth, and why we avoid talking about the truth.

We covered some semi-familiar ground, and gradually ventured into unexplored territory exposing truths to each other. For me a large part of the process of talking about my truths enabled me to understand, by clarifying, arranging and verbalising my truths, so that I could proceed to share them. At some points, I felt myself cringing with an almost demented embarrassment, and an apologetic confessional exposure at the things I shared and aired.

But, with no exception all I said was listened to, understood and appreciated, and best of all, not criticised. You see, exposing weaknesses, failures and shameful behaviours is something that a good friend or partner will take on board, and be honoured to share, and the reason I can say this, as I myself was honoured to be placed in a position of trust, so that I could hear the truths of others.

And this brings me to another thought. That of keeping secrets. I was taught, by my mum, that the best way of knowing other's secrets is to never share them, by being an absolute fortress, never divulging a shared private truth or secret, and once a freind realises that this is the case, they will never be afraid of sharing with you, and this in turn helps them, as once a secret is shared, however dark and private, it 's power is lessened, as per the old maxim, 'a problem shared is a problem halved'.

What an honour, what a priveledge to share a secret. x

Saturday, 8 November 2008

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Oh, it can seem so difficult to ask for help. To admit that in my splendid isolation I cannot overcome all obstacles and hurdles, and that in my accumulated wisdom is not sufficient power and energy to continue to develop and grow.

And, in a sense this is true, but man, things can flow so much easier and quicker with a little help from my friends. And when I realise that I am lucky enough to be able to call upon the help of some extraordinary friends, this 'little help' becomes a big, big help. Those friends with whom I share thoughts, jokes and ideas, those family members who listen and love unconditionally, those people whom I encounter once and then never see again, the rarefied spiritual teachers I have encountered and listened to, the hidden and mysterious energies and forces that can swing to our needs, to all these I seek help.

To grow, mature and increase our capabilities it is essential to communicate and share, a symbiosis that by the laws of karma, creates a rythmn that offers support and nuturing in balanced measure to that which we in turn offer.

But, should we deny that we need help, help will not be so evidentially forthcoming... So, I am learning to be able to ask for help. To ask for help, nourshishment, blessings and protection, in order to increase my positive capacities.

Thank you. xxx

Thursday, 6 November 2008

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I have been wondering if my dreams are possible, and I have come to realise that if I can imagine it, it is possible.

Why should any dream be beyond realisation? The realised dream may not manifest in the way I can imagine, but the reality will be the same.

I'll express an example, or try to... If, for example I wish for one of my children to be happy today, and imagine to realise this, and exert my wishes, and indeed tell them of my wishes, they tend to come true, but not in the exact manner I may have imagined.

This is as my idea of their happiness, and their idea of their happiness are different, and that the realisation of their happiness depends upon many factors of which I am not aware... Their individual experiences, meetings and occurrences through the day. A complex set of karmic appearances, and their individual relationship with each of these appearances.

In other words, how they react to their circumstance.

So, may I be daring enough enough to wish for happiness for many people that I know?

Yes, I can, and this wish is aided and assisted by individual communications that illuminate the possibility of hitherto unrealised potentials for happiness, maybe highlighting a dormant potential, and activating a thought process to stimulate that potential.

This is more than possible, it works.

Within me, and within you, are obscurred potentials, hidden by fear, neglected through distraction, maybe forgotten, but awaiting the appropriate stimulus to begin to grow.

Within me, and within you, these highest potentials will welcome the chance to grow, and overcome the repressive habits and tendencies, and once activated, can be nurtured and increased to the highest capacity.

I believe that within each one of us, lies the capacity to heal our lives, fulfill our wishes and help everyone we encounter to also develop their potential.

We simply need to stop being afraid of the potential of others, and nurture their capabilities... It will help us more than we maybe understand.. No need to envy, for each person has a different set of positive qualities, and, combined they will support us, not threaten us. There is no need to hold anyone back..

Start to imagine, start now.. x

Tuesday, 4 November 2008

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What is the measure of happiness, or, what is yours? How much money do I have in the bank? Does somebody really love me? Is my new car is running really well?

For me, it is a combination of about, say, about 100 check listed items, that, if all can reach a satisfactory standard, and can maintain that standard, for the foreseeable future, then, yes, of course I am happy.

You know what's coming... I only managed 94%, so I'm not quite happy enough...

And, you know what, I cannot remember when I got that 100 list all ticked and checked.. But somewhere, once, I was happy, really, really happy. Then what happened? Well, things changed. But they are always changing, so... if I can't stop things changing what can I do to prevent myself from becoming unhappy?

I can learn to keep my mind happy. Train to keep my mind happy. Learn methods and techniques for keeping my mind happy. Become so familiar with my happy mind that it will eventually revert to being happy, by itself...

And, this will bring contentment, peace and a relaxed attitude to the problems and trials of daily life.. It is so simple, so obvious, that I simple miss it most of the time. I am dumb really.

Saturday, 1 November 2008

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Wednesday's meditation was good. We had the best ever attendance at a class, and we even had to draft in some extra chairs... Good sign.

Guiding meditations is interesting, and not as some have suggested to me, repeated by rote... Part of my training taught me how to both meditate, and reveal (vocally), the processes of focusing the mind and relaxing the body, talking about it whilst I'm doing it really.

But being able to maintain focus and concentration of both aspects simultaneously, maybe a bit like rubbing your tummy in a circular fashion, whilst tapping your head (which I cannot do...). But with training I'm sure I could learn how.

So, why bother to learn how to meditate? Eh? Why? Well for me it works like this.

When I practice meditation, whether for 1 minute, 5 minutes or 20 minutes, what I am seeking to locate, and maintain, is an awareness of a peaceful state of mind, and, a peaceful mind is a happy mind. The more often I seek and identify this peaceful, happy state of mind, the more familiar I become with it, and over time, it becomes simpler, quicker and easier to find, to the extent it can become the default mind, as opposed the familiar irritated or angry mind that normally manifests.

Getting familiar with the state of mind you wish to inhabit! Getting used to being happy, peaceful and content. xxx

Thursday, 30 October 2008

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So, getting into love mode has some special advantages. The primary positive effect is that you will feel good, and that is not a bad thing. I mean, even a private smile softens the worlds hard edges...

And, it can be extended, into more than a moment, into 2 moments even...

Relaxing the body, into the breath, aligned with love, is medicine, a medicine that can temporarily and possibly permanently, heal our pains, help our worries to cease, and enable us to let go of all the inner tensions that prevent relaxation.

I'm now opening up the meditation group I lead, based in Brighton, that will be held in the chapel, at the Sussex County Hospital, on Wednesdays at 12.30. The class will last around 30 minutes, so just a short, but hopefully positive half hour.

Maybe see you there. x

Tuesday, 28 October 2008

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So, these songs of love...

We whisper from within our hearts, those issued carried by the breeze, afar forever until reached, in universal cycle's breath, encircling all, but in one dream, that meets at heaven's open doors, not closed to those who choose to sail, upon that fulsome billowed cloud, but with an ever widening path, that leads within again once more, the realisation sees within, that dawn is love, forevermore...

Each breath holds the power and potential to transform..

x

Monday, 27 October 2008

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Can anything stand in the way of love?

No, it has the power to connect and communicate at all levels. We may think that love is an abstract, a non-tangible construct of poets and dreamers, but it is the single connecting substance of all.

The substance of love cannot be physically grasped (though a bunch of flowers does the trick), nor subtly grasped (though a look into another's eyes can do the trick), but underlying both there exists that which is the very essence of existence, that which connects all, a unifying very subtle state, which, though rarely discerable, draws us to others, unites all humanity, totally and perfectly.

Some through choice, and others due to obscurations, deny this, but do you, do I, truly believe that love cannot connect and heal? For, this love can manifest as compassion, the sincere mental and emotional response to others suffering. Are we not all touched by images of pain, privation, in all its manifestations, be they theatrical, historical, undeniable or even simply possible?

Our heart strings, plucked by love, tuned to others, singing the songs of care and consideration... xxx

Sunday, 26 October 2008

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The relationship of the mind to the body is one of great wonder and mystery, simplicity and sophistication...

Through meditation, focus and concentration, an objective view of the body can be ascertained and from this position an analysis and consideration of bodily mechanics, functions and faults can be witnessed.

This is rather like a mechanic looking into the engine bay of a car, looking for leaks, damage or rust, and then raising the car onto a ramp to look at the running gear, breaks and bearings.

A trained mechanic can see quickly what and where the faults lie.

We are not given this information, guidance or maps to our own bodies, what the mechanic might call a 'service manual', and we tend to offer our own bodies to the understanding of others.

But, really, who actually knows more about our bodies than ourselves? Who is closer? Who has a more detailed history?

Those to whom we entrust our bodies, well-being and health, look for signs and indications with their eyes and to some extent their hands, and also some internal diagnostic systems, from probes to x-rays to scans, but these, extremely coarse methods, lack the capacity to understand the relationships of gross and subtle manifestations of illness, and their relationships with other organs and parts of the body, and their histories, and perhaps most importantly, the emotional relationships with each part of our body, and its relevant emotional histories.

Through meditation, the capacity to gain insights into the totality of the body, in its many levels... muscular, structural, functional and energetic become accessible. And through this process an inner diagnostic facility illuminates, drawing upon all our personal, and sometimes very private, histories...

For even those things which we cannot reveal to others about our histories, can also be, by some faulty and frightened internal filing system, lodged and locked within our minds and bodies, creating a blockage or diversion of the free flow within ourselves.

And, I am suggesting that many causes of our illness arise from these knots, of historic and self-deceptive origin, arising from a denial or burying of events, both 'real' and imagined...

With a desire to look, and a still mind, an apparent objectivity of the body can be 'seen', witnessed and experienced, facilitating a healing experience...

Yes. The healing of one's self, in both the emotional and physical.

Why not? Tell me, why not? Why can you not see exactly what is happening within yourself? Just by making the decision to look, to be open to the possibility that this is possible, actually opens up the pathway to healing, initially releasing the emotional tsunami that lies behind our wall of rigidity.

And this privacy of release allows the waves of inner vision, of self healing, to commence....

This is the start of looking within.

Thursday, 23 October 2008

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My life seems to be accelerating at the moment, the time of stasis seems past, and action and event are rapidly appearing.

This may be a seasonal thing, as I know that I feel energised and inspired in the Autumn time before, but this time it does appear to have a more powerful aspect than before.

The possibilities of life are increasing, the event horizon is broadening, and the sense of communication with the future is drawing clearer, and thereby the options of choice, though unchanged, have an almost magnetic quality, and the choices are clarifying to direct and linked events, facilitating the appearance of being above to have my wishes come true.

So, with this being possible, what might I wish for, and how might I affect the outcomes I desire?

This is where I feel most fortunate. I spent 12 years looking at, understanding, fixing and clarifying my intention, and as such have gained insight into how the outcome of a thought, or wish, is closely related to the intention behind that wish.

The desires and wishes are powered, or fuelled by the intention, as the intention is the motivating force or power behind the wish.

There is a common saying 'be careful what you wish for', and this saying arises from the experiences of those whose wishes have been (ahem) less than ideal...

Wishes do come true, every moment...

Tuesday, 21 October 2008

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I was thinking over the weekend, pondering what it is that we conceal from ourselves.

Much of what we conceal, is really what we vainly attempt to conceal, and that self-deception, that which we consider we master, manifests, visible to others.

In this way, others can know more about us than we might wish for them to see. And, why not? What is that we do not wish to show?

I am going to make a general guess here.

Underlying our fixed projection of ourselves lies a perfected being, who, as afraid of being perceived to be 'weak' attempts to issue a rather cool, perhaps even cold projection, to prevent possible exploitation.

Now then, how often have we heard... 'Oh, he/she is such a beautiful and loving person, but it takes a long time to get to know them'.

Defence mechanism, tsk.

So, how about the option of showing those loving, caring, generous, compassionate sides of our personality, without fear of exposure or exploitation.

Or. Is it a case of 'I will show you mine if you show me yours'.

So, how about an amnesty. An amnesty of false ego, a chance to hand in our false and frightened identities at the desk, and bare our souls to each other.

I will show you mine first. Take that attitude, show the way, create the difference, be unafraid. As, you may think that you will be percieved as weak, but that is not the case, you will earn the trust and respect of others.

Or, how about this? An International Day of Open Hearts.

Suggest a date please.... xxx

Monday, 20 October 2008

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We sit, we exist, we live, on the brink of the unknown, the unexplored, and also upon the brink of chaos.

The next moment of our lives, hitherto unknown, holds a myriad of potentials that meet, blend and interact in a swell of experience that holds the both the security of experience (letting us know that things will be as we expect), but also the chaotic and seemingly random arrivals and events which bring that which we could not have anticipated.

And, every now and again, the system of our lives meets an event that has no precedent in it's magnitude or impact, and at these times we encounter, the chaos...

But, I am going to suggest that the chaos is actually the 'norm' whilst order is the rarity.

From the turbulence of any motion, and the interactions of both gross and subtle energies, amid the cauldron of movement, in which we sit, arrives the infinite ebbs and flows of appearance.

We can always expect the unexpected. It will arrive.

I am not however about to abandon all to the chaos, as I can know, that at the very heart of things, is my mind, and in that I can find stillness, a position which knows that the chaos cannot be controlled, but can be witnessed, and with experience, can be shared, in the same way that a surfer can ride an immense wave, powerless against the might of change, but able to remain in balance...

That balance we can find, in our minds, and in our minds alone.

But, there is an interconnection with others, and this connection, that exists within the mind, is that of love. A shared experience of open hearted love, upon which we all depend, and if we can find it within ourselves, unafraid, it wil connect with the love of others.

This connection, this experience, is where our own healing, and the healing of others dwells. An uninhibited experience and expression of love. x

Friday, 17 October 2008

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Over the weekend we shared two coming togethers of friends and family.

On the Saturday lunchtime around 30 members of my family met for lunch, to eat, drink and share, on the 3rd anniversary of my Mum's death.

So many bright, funny and beautiful people, sat around a large table, alongside the sea, in the bright October sun.

Then, following the sunset, we headed East to meet our rare and special friends.

Some arrived spontaneously and others by arrangement, but in the magical synchronicty that arises on these occasions, every one who should have been there was there.

Never in my life have I experienced such clear, loving, healing and beautiful energies, and these, raised together, under a moonlit sky, around the log fires, created a spirit of harmony and sharing.

Each individual contributed their own special qualities, and these merged into a common goal, that of preparing for the futures, clearing of the pasts and increasing the power and energy of the moment.

With no guidance or agendas, the most extraordinary events unfolded, including a walk through the mists of pre-dawn, to the high ground of the mysterious mount, past the oak encircled ponds, to sit and pray for the healing of our beautiful friend Chris, who has stepped out of the dark of cancer into the light of healing.

We sat, and awaited the sun's warmth and greeting to symbolise the dawning of Chris' rebirth...

A gathering of loving hearts and pure souls, sharing our special and rare occasion. Everybody essential for the completion.

Things simply could not have been more harmonious, and I shall quote Chris' mantra.... 'It's all Good'.

Monday, 13 October 2008

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Open your heart. Release the power of your love and understanding... out into the world.

Just by imagining this process, affects will occur, within your own mind, and within the minds of others.

Silently, without grimace or affectation, imagine all the love you have ever experienced, gathered into a single outflowing, radiating and filling your body, then the room, then the area, and on and outwards.

This is a simple healing meditation for the body.

Short, and simple. x

Saturday, 11 October 2008

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Joy, determination and courage, all mental attributes.

Each carrying the potential to bring life's experience into the realms of heightened and individual capacity, enabling the overcoming of obstacles, worries and difficulties.

And combined, holding the power to achieve our dreams, our wishes, fulfil our aims and desires, but... with a positive ripple effect, and a non-harmful deflection. In other words, we get what we want, and others are helped in the process, a win-win.

This is not far removed from the ideal.

Joy, a happy and positive outlook on the situation, a view that chooses to exude a radiance, and whose light can overcome any potential shadow.

Determination, a will to pursue an ideal, to be willing to view obstacles as opportunites, and not be swayed or tempted into inaction.

Courage, a fearlessness of the conviction we have that our goal is both achievable and holds the potential for benefit, and therefore courage carries the wish from the realms of the imagination into the reality.

Do not hesitate to imagine, and achieve. x

Thursday, 9 October 2008

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How deep can one enter the mind in meditation?

It is such a subtle process, the blending of mindfulness and alertness, when concentrating on a thought of meditation. Too much focus causes the mind to tighten, and become distracted from the thought, and too little can cause the thought to slip away.

One is like squeezing a bar of soap that slips our of the grasp when over-tightened, or simply crushing a butterfly in an over zealous grasp, and the other is like allowing the butterfly to escape from between the fingers of an over loose grip...

So, the subtle focus of the mind, whilst in absorption can be tricky, as, there is also the excitement that arises when meditation starts to 'go really well', as the elation of success can be a distraction too, so a level of abstraction, whilst relaxing and focusing are required... as well as some understanding of the object of meditation.

It can appear, when meditating, that the entire universe ceases to exist, and the mind's inner trajectory, like some sub-atomic animation, gathers inward towards an infinitely small inner positioning, where all ceases other than the mind's illumination, known as clear light.

The profundity of peace and clarity at such times is astonishing, and once visited and experienced, never forgotten. An absolute understanding of the relationships of mind, body, truth and existence become part of the mind's awareness, an understanding or realisation that pervades all subsequent thoughts.

Do try to learn your own mind through meditation, the rewards are infinite......

Monday, 6 October 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 196

Day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment my mood changes.

It shifts around, sometimes soaring upwards to the blue sky, and sometimes deepens, heading towards a darker place...

I love it when it soars, but am confused and pained when it darkens, and this oscillation brings a dissatisfaction.

But, over the years I have learned to reign back the euphorias, in order to prevent a dramatic descent, and this perhaps is the most difficult task of training my mind, as it seems so gorgeous when things are going so well, so why should I wish to remind myself that things will not stay this way?

It seems wasteful and negative to hold back an upswing in the mind, but it is truly a mark of wisdom to take this view, not, mind you, to retrain elation, but to temper the inexhaustible sense of perpetuity that accompanies it, using an abstract element of the mind to recognise its impermanence, and thus to be non-attached to its continuity... Enjoying it, whilst recognising its temporary nature.

This tool, or weapon against mood swings, is far more valuable than recognising when darkness is looming or encroaching, as when the mind is happy it is far easier to have a sense of objectivity in recognising the mind's positioning. And, more importantly to gain some control over the minds future destination...

I can think of the analogy of a child. It is far easier to control a child whilst happy than when angy or upset, as their mind is open to suggestions and options, and, by inference, less closed down.

I'm suggesting it is useful to consider our own mind in this way, working with the mind when it is happy and flexible, rather than waiting until it is too late...

Locate and identify your own happy state of mind, bookmark it for future reference! Add it to your favourites, and never forget, it is only ever a single thought away...

Love it!

Thursday, 2 October 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 195

I am standing at a crossroads.

Often, for me, when I reach the Autumn months, options and choices appear, and I can either stay where I am in my life, or move ahead into new and uncharted territory.

But, from where I stand it can seem that nothing has changed, and that things are the same as they were a year ago, or two years ago, or more...

Until yesterday, when I bumped into an old friend whom I have not met for a couple of years, and he called me a chameleon, inasmuch I have changed so many aspects of my life over the years.

This indictated that change has occurred...

I have an opportunity now, to activate a dream, an option, a possibility, one that I have been contemplating and considering for over 2 years and now, it is upon me.

And I am stood on the doorstep, prevaricating, procrastinating and dithering, but knowing in my heart that I will go ahead, as my wish has come true, and now I have to participate, rather than just contemplate.

It is time for action....

Tuesday, 30 September 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 194

The power of healing lies in expression.

To see with clarity the wounds that have harmed, to see them in their coldest glare, without filtration or censorship, thus identified.

An inner honesty, a non-denial of past pains and hurts, whose power lies in being denied, once highlighted, lose strength, and no longer gathered in dark witness...

A private, intimate therapy, once seen, expressed through art or word, or maybe music, or in our method, that we choose, to be non-afraid of our experience, as only we can know the depth, the power of our memories.

And, if unacknowledged, retain capacity to harm us.

We can release their latent energy, through gradual uncovering, to reach the actual cause of pain, and once familiar to the concious mind, shrink and weaken, to diminish...

Be not afraid, remove the splinter that remains.

Friday, 26 September 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 193

I witnessed the growth of a man this weekend.

Sometimes our lives create circumstances that hinder our growth, development and understandings, and the bruising that occurs can prevent any opportunities to even listen to any words of opportunity.

We shut down, though mired in our misery, and the damage creates a barrier to expression of our desires, emotions and needs, and as a result life becomes a prison.

Our lovely friend, who has been battered by life and love, has started to peep over the parapet of life, and has noticed the new and distant horizons, holding fresh and clear vistas offering a vast wealth of opportunities.

It takes time to gain trust in new companions, especially on the spiritual paths, as we feel so vulnerable and exposed, and we lack experience in expressing our desires, needs and wishes.

The language and semantics of the spiritual world can be so off-putting and intimidating, to the extent that we can throw the baby out with the bath water, so... it seems to me that words might have less power than actions, as, people see more in our actions and deeds than they hear in our words.

Our beautiful friend has began to compose poetry, expressing and understanding the extent of his own suffering and experience, and as a result has been able to understand with clarity his own experience, thus gaining an understanding of his traumas, and, once witnessed with clarity the trauma loses power to hinder.

Freedom through expression...

Monday, 22 September 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 192

What is the view from your window? What is your outlook?

I'm thinking of my point of view, my attitude to events, people and life.

Is your glass half empty or half full?

My mind sits on a hair trigger, and it can easily fall either way, apparently of its own accord, but this is not the actual way things happen.

The view or opinion of whether the outlook is positive or negative is one that we have absolute control over. Make no mistake here, we have the power to change our outlook moment by moment.

In the mind we have a switch that we can access, and this can be facilitated by a simple test... Ready?

You have to be sure that you want to try this, so, what you do is smile. Yes, simply smile, and take notice of the mental response to this physical action. You may wish to try this several times to enable a 'bookmarking' of the elevated mental state that accompanies a smile.

And, over time, it is possible to access the elevated mental state, by 'mentally smiling', tuning into a positive state of mind.

Creating, developing and maintaining an 'inner smile'.

It takes practice, but really, isn't it worth it?

Friday, 19 September 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 191

Children see the world through eyes of both innocence and wisdom.

They can see and express themselves in a wonderfully clear manner, without guilt, embarrassment or any sense of self image, allowing their expressions to be revealed in their words and deeds, their thoughts being open to view through their consequential actions.

No filter in action.

As we grow we can develop defence mechanisms and strategies which conceal our minds, often at our own expense...

The body we walk around in becomes our first level of defence, and over the years or decades, this defensive shield leaves its trace in our body language and posture. We can lock at certain points within the body, habitually, or tighten muscle groups and these eventually create bad body 'locks' which begin to deform our inner energy flow.

Maybe as you sit and read you might notice a part of your back, neck, shoulders or hips which cause some discomfort, and over the years it may be that these become sources of pain, and eventually illness.

These postural discomforts are closely related to our emotions, and in particular to those emotions we wish to conceal through shame, embarrassment or guilt. Such tiny tensions that might become threats to our health and well-being.

For me, I have to unwind my emotional history, re-visit the points of discomfort and try to understand the historical precedent that placed them there in the first place, and sometimes these can hark back to minor events in my past, but they are events that created a defensive reaction within my body, and that seemed to prevent the expression of my emotion at the time... appeared to...

As, the strain to conceal emotions can be more devastating in the long run, than that of having the courage to express them in the first instance. Trying not feel weak or vulnerable to your own expression of emotion....

The flow of emotional recognition and release will facilitate a an immediate sense of relaxation and peace, and this is yours, to experience as you sit.. x

Monday, 15 September 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 190

We went on a pilgrimage over the weekend.

Samantha, Coral, Stephanie and I went to Glastonbury, to take the waters, climb the Tor and to find our common grounds. The weekend was exquisite, an absolutely magical weekend with laughter, harmony and love.

The idea was initiated by a friends of ours, Sarah, who wears an astonishing piece of crystal jewellery, and told us of a special shop, Venus, where these rare jewels are sold, so Samantha and I determined to take a journey at some time, to see if we could find her an individual necklace, as a token of my love.

A few weeks ago, Coral was feeling rather vulnerable and unsure, and I thought that time alone with her dad and Samantha might be healing and grounding for her, and the idea came that we should take her with us, on our jewellery pilgrimage, and spend the weekend with us in that most feminine of places, Glastonbury.

The idea grew, and we invited Stephanie, Samantha's daughter to come along too, so we could all spend some time together.

I was with my 3 Queens; Samantha, Coral and Stephanie, 3 gorgeous Goddesses!

We travelled easily and found a beatiful cottage to stay and made our way to Venus, where we found 3 perfect necklaces, one for each Queen, mounted crystals, each one beckoning it's smiling Goddess.

All 3 are being worn, and shall have the power to restore, protect and heal the wearers. 3 amazing jewels, for 3 amazing girls.

So much happened over our 48 hours, so many perfect moments. We each found our peace.

Monday, 8 September 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 189

We, Samantha and I, spend many of our summer weekends with a group of friends in a field in the country. We have friends who are artists, healers, jewellers, gardeners, sculptors, magicians, jugglers, community workers, musicians, telecommunications freaks, and more.

These bring different faiths, understandings and histories, and are aged from toddlers to 70 year olds.

Over the years we have come to understand each other, share and communicate with other and help each other. And when, and if, anyone is struggling with any aspect of their lives the friends will work together to lift their spirits, and provide whatever spiritual and practical assistance we can.

We have come to know each other's families, children and friends, and all the problems and difficulties that these can bring, but also we have shared each others triumphs and movements.

I have lived in communities in the past, including 3 years in a Buddhist centre, and have come to understand that the self regulated and sharing attitudes we have found in our own community is the most nuturing way of life.

None of us is afraid of revealing our weakness, fears and frailties, and the collective wisdom manages to help carry each other when we need support and help.

No subject is taboo, and we have in our night talks, around our fires, met and communicated with a varied range of visitors, some bringing the most devastating histories of abuse.

It has helped me realise that we all carry the deep scars of wounds, from the events that we experience and witness in our lives, and the expression and vocalization of these events can be cathartic and healing.

There is, thank goodness, no hierarchy within our community, as we all learn from each other, and are able to both listen, talk and share.

I adore all of our special friends, those magnificent, creative and brave angels, who are prepared to give and take, as, taking can be a harder barrier to overcome than that of giving.

I am proud to take the advice, love and generosity of my dear friends, and proud to be able to offer my contribution. I love each and every one, with their individuality, quirks and attitudes, and the courage they have to overcome obstacles and learn from their experiences.

And also our children who have the opportunity to see this 'alternative' lifestyle, who witness how adults can and do communicate and express, and not on the manner of the TV shows would have us believe.

Now then, would our community be a candidate for a reality show? No thank you! We are too happy, integrated and communicative for interesting viewing, but if you wish to visit, you will be welcome! x

Sunday, 31 August 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 188

So, the spiritual path is my journey. An actual pathway that takes me to the destination of my choice.

The first component in my path was understanding that a destination existed. This destination is to live a happy, peaceful and contented life, and to be able to share my understanding of the path with others, if they so wish.

Each day the path varies, but the destination remains constant, to create a better world around me. And the journey starts with me.

My responsibility is to change my life, my habits, my behaviours, and re-train as it were, to create new habits and behaviours, those which take me closer to my chosen destination, and choose to abandon those thoughts and habits which bring me anxiety, fear and pain.

You see, my mind loves its familiar paths, those habitual pathways, my responses to situations that keep me trapped and repeating the boring and frustrating loops of behaviour, but I don't, and... I wish to create new patterns, ones that are creating fresh responses that are non-harmful to me and those around me.

And you will have them too. The time does come when a wake up call is needed, and now is that time. Do you row with your partner? Do you have anger issues? Do you find the same pattern repeating itself? Again and again? But, it never resolves? I know you do.

If you are not afraid of change, tell me what your problem is, and I will be able to see it from an objective point of view, and be able to illuminate pathways or routes out of the situation, leading to the reduction and cessation of the power of the that situation to repeat and continue to harm you. I can do this. One to one.

There is a way to change the situation, step by step along the path, your path to your inner peace, your sense of safety and your stillness. I am offering my friendship. x

Thursday, 28 August 2008

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SPIRITUAL ORGANIC 187

Talking and listening, an interchange and exchange, of what?

This depends upon if you are prepared to listen and enable the talker to express themselves without fear, inhibition or concealment, and, if you are prepared to talk your truth, express your fears and failings... As, every person has their catalogue of concerns and worries, it is part of the human condition.

It is too easy to withhold or suppress the experiences you really want to air and share, those that you have not been able to talk about, but these are really the thoughts and emotions we truly wish to express, rather than the lightweight banter and chit chat that fills our lives.

So much of the talk is deflective, shielding ourselves from what we need to share to heal our lives and our relationships, that generally fail through a lack of communication.

I am puzzled as to why it can be that the person with whom we are closest in life, that we say we love the most, can be the person with whom we are least able to communicate.

Might it be that we had created a false persona of strength that we do not wish to reveal as less than perfect? Or some ego identity that, over time, becomes harder to maintain? As, it becomes harder and harder to live up to one's own lies... the truth will out.

Take the time to talk of what concerns you, have no fear, as people will love to talk to you, and also listen to you. Take your agenda away from the conversation and do express your innermost fears.

We are so lucky, Samantha and I, that we can talk, and we can listen, both to each other, and to those we meet, and there is never an occasion when we do not learn more about ourselves.

Over this last weekend we met several new friends, sat and talked around our fire, and shared our lives, with meaning and understanding. Everyone is welcome, as we need to learn. x

Tuesday, 26 August 2008

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